“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.” 
– Sophia Loren

Discovering the beauty in our maturation is a step to self-love and acceptance. Acknowledging what prevents us from owning our years is essential to spiritual growth. The desire to look youthful is not the issue; masking who we are behind the guise of youth is.

With societal consciousness continuing to grow and expand, it is time to embrace all stages of life.

The good news is how we think about age will determine if we grow old or become ageless. Ageless means’ being of all generations, not aging or appearing to age’. Becoming ageless happens when we shift our perspective.

As a young woman, I admired women who embraced their age. Exuding an aura of wisdom and youthful curiosity, they seemed to be shrouded in mystery,  allowing their hair to grey, holding a secret behind the twinkle in their eyes. I yearned to know what allowed them to be so confident and free.

Years later, as my grey began to appear, I lacked the courage to let it show. I was not ready to become the woman I was meant to be. I struggled. The ramifications seemed immense.

Ageism is rampant in the world in which I work. I have been a commercial casting director in Los Angeles for more than 30 years. In this image and youth-oriented business, was I endangering my livelihood if I allowed my age to show? As you approach 50, you are looking at the exit door in the realm of advertising.

So, like millions of women, I colored the grey. Momentarily I felt better, and yet I felt like a spiritual charlatan for hiding my true self. The dread of exposure was always hanging over me.

When I finally decided to let my grey shine, most of my friends were shocked.

To their reactions, I responded:” I am doing it so I can speak my truth.”

Coming to terms with my aging was crucial for my journey of self-realization. Acceptance of who I am was imperative. I needed to face myself without shame. It was not easy. At times, I was unrecognizable to myself. The inner image I carried had not reconciled with the one reflecting me – who was that older woman looking at me?

Nothing in nature stands still, so why should we?

The secret those women knew so many years ago was knowing they did not need society’s permission to be. So instead, they followed the course of nature, flowing with the change of seasons, understanding the power of renewal, regrowth, and resilience.

The energy they exuded crossed generations. There is nothing more attractive or sexy than someone living their truth. Those women were the forerunners of the fashion of aging, setting the stage.

But society still has a stranglehold on our perceptions. The time to challenge those perceptions has arrived.

We must let go of our acceptance of society’s stigma about aging. The stigma happens slowly. We barely realize it is happening. As a result, there is a sense of irrelevance, an almost imperceptible fading; deeper within, there is a feeling something is changing.

Then one day, we feel as if we are no longer modern. We have a veil of invisibility around us. Yet, it is not about who we are. It is about how our culture imposes its prejudice of age upon us.

For this reason, many women resist the aging process. They are holding onto perceived youth, shielding the truth of reality from themselves. They have not made peace with their reflection in the mirror.

When I decided to follow the course of nature and let my greys show, I let go of pressures that I hadn’t realized I was carrying around — societal pressures to hide the aging process. Of course, I am not advocating for all women to go grey; it is a personal choice, just like our wardrobe. Yet, for me, it was a gateway to my authentic self. Evidence of my aging was a badge that said I could be and do as I wished. I no longer needed permission to be me. It was liberating.

A profound sense of peace emerged; with it, it was as if my soul’s purpose was screaming out to the Universe; I got it! I am whole and complete and perfect as I am.

On Becoming Ageless:

My vision has improved. I now see qualities like kindness, gratitude, empathy, and compassion more than physical traits. I can see another’s a journey without judgment but with tolerance and understanding.

My sense of hearing has been heightened. I hear the positive more than the negative. I can hear unspoken words.

I have become more flexible. Ancient trees that have lived hundreds or thousands of years have become my teachers. They may stand upright or twisted from their experiences, but they bend and sway with the winds; having learned to be rigid will only break their branches.

I have become stronger. As with trees, they grow stronger and more resilient each year, and so do I. Sharp words no longer cut me, nor can the daggers from angry eyes pierce my skin. I have not toughened but instead have become like flowing water.

I can nourish myself. As trees drop their leaves to nourish the ground, I, too, have learned to nurture myself. When thoughts enter my mind, which does not serve my higher good, I let them go.

And, so, I have become softer. I have learned the most delicate of touch can affect the most profound healing.

To become who we are meant to be means to let go of who we once were. The need for others to define us ceases to exist. We can stand tall with pride, wearing the scars of our experiences and our grey as evidence of our being. With grace and acceptance, the becoming is effortless.

Because we’ve aged does not mean it’s too late to redefine our identities; we are millions of incredible, impactful, self-aware women. So let us embrace our wisdom, honoring our values and worthiness to pave the way for the coming generations. It is through confidence that true beauty shines. And it is this beauty that makes us ageless. So let us become the #socialtrendworthfollowing.