Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.

~ Kahlil Gibran

 

My cat Gigi passed away today. I assisted his transition. I have been fortunate with so many of my four-legged loves; they transitioned on their own time due to old age, but a few have needed my help.

And as devoted as I am to their well-being, the difficulty lies in making the phone call to the veterinarian. It feels against the natural rhythm of things. Yet, in the best interests of their quality of life, we make the call and bear the tears and remorse ourselves.

Questioning the perfection of timing in all things always leads me to the acceptance that yes, timing is always perfect. Even if we cannot see it. So today, before I took Gigi in, I looked into the spiritual timing of passing, in numerology it is a 5 vibration. The answer was comforting and validating that there are no mistakes.

A 5-day symbolizes transition, transformation, adventure, and the soul’s release of constraints. A shift into freedom.

Not only is that message meant for Gigi’s soul, but it is also a reflection of my life.

I was raised with the idea that when an animal, and a cat is certainly at the top of the hierarchy of vibrational prowess, comes or goes out of one’s life, it is a signal for change. Change can be many things to many people. However, when I read what the 5 energy represents, release of constraints, I paused to reflect on the meaning of this message.

The older we grow, hopefully, the more soul-searching we have done. Then, arriving at a certain age, many of us assume we have done the work and nothing else needs reflection. I am not quite that confident to think I don’t have a lifetime to work on myself. The plus side is that there is definitely less standing in the way between what needs to be released and the junk that keeps it from being seen. The junk is our armor, the stuff we have built up to protect us. The beliefs that make our lives run seemingly ‘correctly’. They show up as triggers, the automatic defenses we have when we hear or see something that goes against our grain. Or those very strong opinions we have about something that no one can talk us out of thinking. Our junk is as varied as we are.

So, as I reflect on Gigi’s passing, “Great Awakener, when a pet chooses this frequency for their exit, it suggests their soul’s mission was to break a cycle or spark a significant change in your life.”

Where am I stuck? Where is movement needed? Transitions are often the catalyst to move forward with something that is being avoided. It could also be a question of whether I have been playing it safe and am now asked to release old patterns and move into a new version of myself?

Change for me is a reminder to go with the flow and open my senses to what I need to hear.

My animals are my teachers. The message I felt from Gigi was simple: “I have taught you everything I can about being wild and free. Now it is your turn to embrace the unknown.”

Sitting with the stillness Gigi has left behind, I understand the message wasn’t just about his freedom. It was about mine. His transition marks a shift I have felt coming and no longer can ignore. I am ready to release, let go, and transform. And I suppose that is the tender gift inside every goodbye.

To live in this world, you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones… and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.

~Mary Oliver