The authentic self is the soul made visible.
~ Anonymous.
Humans are complex. We say we want love, meaningful friendships, or fulfilling careers—yet our actions often betray those desires. We’ve allowed others to define us, and over time, we begin to live their reality instead of our own.
Living authentically means going against a lifetime of conditioning. We’ve learned to fit in, to please, to perform. Breaking free of those patterns requires fierce determination, repeated practice, and the courage to face the discomfort of change. Many people sense they want authenticity, but sensing it and truly living it are two very different things. Achieving it is not a single act, but a lifelong journey.
This misalignment often runs deeper than we realize, rooted in the fear of vulnerability and the discomfort of revealing parts of ourselves we’ve kept hidden. We say we want the truth, but often avoid revealing our own. We demand it from others, yet shrink from showing up fully ourselves.
The struggle is genuine. We long for emotionally available partners, yet may unconsciously hold back. We crave connection, but fear exposure. The inner conflict can be intense because to see ourselves truly, we must also face our limitations. That truth can hurt. So instead, we often choose to stay numb. Distraction becomes our drug of choice, and the illusion of self grows stronger.
It’s common to stay in a dead-end job or an unfulfilling relationship to avoid the uncertainty of the unknown. We exude happiness while quietly living in dissatisfaction. Cultural conditioning reinforces this pattern, pressuring us to prioritize appearances, status, and approval over depth and honesty.
The concept of “the real deal” is ubiquitous in advertising, but the pursuit itself often distracts us from the truth. It traps us in comparison, performance, and projection. What is authentic for me may not be for you. And when we chase someone else’s version of what looks real, we often end up just as disconnected as before.
Authenticity is not a brand. It’s not a look. It’s a return to our values, feelings, and lived experiences. It requires stillness, courage, and an unwavering willingness to live from the inside out.
In the long run, the real deal isn’t something to chase—it’s something to uncover within. To embody it means choosing honesty over comfort, depth over appearance, and presence over performance. By doing so, it asks us to stop searching outward and start coming home to ourselves. Only then can we begin to live the life we say we want, not the one we’ve been taught to portray.
It sounds so simple, but if you just be yourself, you’re different than anyone else.
Tony Bennett
Rick
I think getting caught up in life’s complex connections sometimes becomes a maze our paths have to navigate. For me, I lost three dear workmates, my friend who I knew the longest in life, my brother in law, two sisters, my wife and now my only surviving sister has Alzheimer’s. In all this loss, I realize the only way to live is to talk your truth all the time. Let it out and don’t hold back. Love your family and friends and don’t hold back. Put it on the line. The truth, put it on the line. In my life now, if I can help a friend in need, I do it.. I volunteer a lot. I don’t have to hold back. I give freely. Maybe the key for me is that I have found music again. I was without for a long time. I thought I needed to know about the news and became a news junkie.
I grew up with music in my teens and 20’s. It was almost as though I was plugged in.. I have found it again and I know, everyone I have lost in the last three years would want me to be living the best life I could live right now… not waiting for something later down the road. I am bringing something back from the 60’s and 70’s… I am living in the moment… That’s what George, Scott, Nial, Kenny, Shimon, Geri and Lynn would want. For God’s sake, four of my old co-workers have had heart by-pass surgeries… if you need to find me, I will be living in the moment.