“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn’t exist…..Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist”
~ Stephen Hawking

Striving for perfection is an unattainable reality. Perceived perfection is a relative concept, depending on one’s social and cultural viewpoint. Ideas of perfection can and will always remain a relative ideal. Often equated with ambition, we aim to go above and beyond to attain the accolades given to only the highest achievers, the most beautiful, or those with athletic prowess. Emphasis is placed on perfection when, in truth, perfection is unreachable.

Humans are flawed, yet we are the essence of perfection within these flaws: each is a unique specimen. The pursuit of perfection ceases when we understand we are already perfect within our perceived imperfections.

Reaching perfection is an underlying anxiety of those with impostor syndrome, defined as the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved. It is prevalent among successful people because we often struggle to honor ourselves and our self-worth. Yet, it cannot occur if we do not embrace the truth that we are enough as we are. An original cannot be an impostor of itself.

Striving for perfection implies that we can attain a state of lawlessness, devoid of any deficits, faults, or blemishes. But, unfortunately, this is a unicorn; it doesn’t exist. If we could somehow reach that state of flawlessness, we would also be outcasts, unreachable, and intolerable. No one likes being around someone who claims to be perfect. It highlights our deficiencies and removes any commonality we have. We want to see the mess and humanness, the struggles, the fears, the ups and downs, and the feelings.

So why do we strive for perfection when, in actuality, we don’t like those who act as if they are?

Somewhere in our upbringing, we were taught to believe that we were, in fact, not enough as we are. You may have heard it from family or teachers. Words that may have been bantered around innocently, unaware and unconscious that those words would have tangible, lasting effects. You are an idiot, you are not pretty enough, you are too short, too skinny, or you will never amount to anything: the adjectives used to brainwash effectively are endless, and they contribute to a deep state of insecurity.

You may have been mistreated, compared with others, or falsely blamed for things you had nothing to do with.

The ultimate level of self-acceptance is accepting that we are enough just as we are, without needing to be anything more. However, acceptance is not a sign that our inner work is complete. On the contrary, it is a starting point for understanding. The transformation can begin once this is acknowledged, with diligence, consciousness, and honest eyes.

If you are willing to put effort into striving for perfection at work, are you ready to put the work into yourself to uncover the most of who you are?

It begins with rewiring our thoughts.

Start by identifying your negative self-talk. The niggly voice reminds us that we cannot succeed even though our hearts want to. The conversations we have with ourselves permit us to give up when an obstacle comes our way or quit before we start. We often find excuses that occupy the space of taking action, and then blame it on being busy, justifying our actions to our subconscious mind.

Although the kernel of those thoughts began long ago, we carry with us their ramifications. The good news is that it is history.

It is necessary to focus on where we are headed if we want to change our future. The past is the past, so leave it there.

Two thoughts cannot occupy the same space at the same time. So when you hear your negative thoughts, erase them. Yes, erase them. Say it out loud: I erase that thought, or take your hand as if erasing a chalkboard. Then replace it with an ‘I can, I am enough’ thought.

When we accept that we are enough, our lives bloom. We attract what we deserve by alerting the universe to what we want. With acceptance comes the flexibility to adapt.

The path to self-actualization is personal, and letting go of behaviors we have long considered integral to our identity can be immensely challenging. Many will never do it; however, many will. The desire for change gives us the courage to move from those who don’t to those who do. Although it may seem daunting at first, the rewards will outweigh the effort. Often, those with the furthest to come are the ones who climb the highest, proving that it is all possible.

Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it. Perfection is impossible; just strive to do your best

~ Jerry Moran